Pushing the Darkness Away

I awaken at 7:00am – not bad for a Saturday. I want to just stay under the covers and do…

NOTHING.

But so far so good. I have made my coffee, put my clothes in the dryer and started the dishwasher. I want this to be a good day. I am getting my grandson overnight and he is such a doll.

I feel so damn guilty that I want to just be within myself instead of doing anything. But that guilt has its consequences.

I have been injuring myself yet again the past few weeks. It has been months since I have let my stress, guilt or whatever succumb to injury.  It has been a few days since I have hurt myself so I am giving myself a pat on the back for that.

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Today will be good. I know it will. I just have to let the darkness wash away and my selfish desire to just hide within myself fade. It will.

I have been living this life of mental illness for so long and have learned so much about myself through therapy that I know times like these will fade away.

But the times can still suck when I am in them.

I hope you can feel light in your day. And if you can’t, remember, the darkness will fade in time.

Thanks for reading

J.W.

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